Funny Valentine's Day Quotes
Today is Valentine's Day. Or, as men like to call it, Extortion day ~ Jay Leno
Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots ~ Hoosier Farmer
My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to ~ Rita Rudner
Never go to bed mad -- stay up and fight ~ Phyllis Diller
No matter how love sick a woman is, she shouldn't take the first pill that comes along ~ Joyce Brothers
One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry ~ Oscar Wilde
The Eskimos have fifty two words for snow because it is so special to them; there ought to be as many for love ~ Margaret Atwood
The poor wish to be rich, the rich wish to be happy, the single wish to be married, and the married wish to be dead ~ Ann Landers
Three things can't be hidden: coughing, poverty, and love ~ Yiddish Proverb
To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia ~ H. L. Mencken
True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked ~ Erich Segal
Valentine’s Day is when a lot of married men are reminded what a poor shot Cupid really is ~ Anonymous
Women are cursed, and men are the proof ~ Rosanne Barr
Women with pasts interest men. They hope history will repeat itself ~ Mae West
A bride at her second wedding does not wear a veil. She wants to see what she is getting ~ Helen Rowland
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife ~ Groucho Marx
Get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day ~ Mickey Rooney
I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life ~ Rita Rudner
I wanted to make it really special on Valentine's Day, so I tied my boyfriend up. And for three solid hours I watched whatever I wanted on TV ~ Tracy Smith
It is impossible to love and be wise ~ Francis Bacon
It’s funny how we set qualifications to the right person to love, when we know at the back of our heads the person whom we truly love will always be an exception ~ Ally McBeal
Love has the power of making you believe what you would normally treat with the deepest suspicion ~ Mirabeau
Love is a grave mental disease ~ Plato
Lovers who share a sense of humor, stay together longer. Humor is the key to an evergreen relationship. If you want to win your lover's heart, use humor. With a dash of humor and love, make your day extra special with these funny Valentine's Day quotes, and readmore Valentines Day 2012 Sayings and Quotes
Source: http://quotations.about.com